“What the heck?”

26 02 2010

Jim and I have a nephew who used to say, frequently, “What the heck, man?” He probably said this more and more, as we laughed more and more, but it became a standard phrase for Jim and me. When one of us is doing something that the other one is confused about, or when we observe something else going on that is confusing.. we occasionally turn to one another and ask, “What the heck, man?”

Sometimes, that’s how I feel with Lent. What the heck? Why all the bother? Why the fuss? Don’t we do this year after year, journeying to the cross,

Friday, Feb. 26th

trying to be more disciplined, or intentional, or less engaged in other activities that distract us from God?

I could state the obvious: God’s working on us, God’s growing us up, God’s using us and others. But the obvious doesn’t always help, when we’re in the middle of it. This sounds as though I’m really struggling with Lent. I’m not. At least not this year. But nor am I seeing any significant changes in my life–spiritual or otherwise. And so I wonder, “what the heck?”

This afternoon, Jim, Kajsa, Abby, and I took a drive out and about. I took this photo, because I couldn’t figure it out. What was it? What the heck, man? I couldn’t make it out, and we couldn’t exactly pull over at that point. So I took a photo with my zoom, in anticipation of viewing it later on the computer. Funny thing is, that even through my zoom lens, I didn’t take the time to see what this was.. I knew I would look at it later. And, voila, it appears to be (but I could be wrong) a bunch of bird feeders. That’s about all I know. But at least I know a little more than I did from my first view.

I’m hoping the same might happen with my Lenten Journey, 2010. I’m hoping that though significant changes in my life aren’t obvious today, change is still happening.. that God is working, that God is growing me up, that God is using–me and others. I’m hoping that though I may have more  “what the heck?” moments, that the picture will become clearer later on.


26 02 2010

I’ve wanted curtains for the living room windows since we moved here. There were some curtains up in the parsonage, but I said go ahead and take them down, not realizing it would take me two months to find something I liked in a reasonable price range. But here we are. The other day I bought them. Tonight Jim and I put them up. And whew.. I can relax.

Thursday, Feb. 25th

I have relaxed anyhow, at our “new house”, as Kajsa still calls it. But I like to have windows covered at night. So now I can relax even more. I know, this photo doesn’t really show much… but they’re pretty simple: brown corduroy. Not what I would have thought I’d pick. But I did.

It’s hardly comparable, I know… but I like the image in Psalm 27, of God hiding the Psalmist. (Psalm 27:5: “For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will set me high on a rock.”) Of course I wish God could literally hide me some days, under his tent. Or behind brown corduroy curtains. And then on some days, I wish God would set me high on a mountain, because I feel so confident of where I am in my faith, my life, my etc.

More frequently, though, I find myself wishing for the big curtain… a big tent, to hide behind. Then I could relax, I tell myself. And yet, I can relax now–If I so choose.  Whether or not I think I can feel God’s “curtain” to hide behind, God is present. Whether or not I think God is actually hiding me is irrelevant–God is present. Not shielding me from trouble or pain. But God is present, ready for me to relax in the knowledge of his love, guidance, and shield.